OH, LIFE.


five days until christmas (four, depending on your point of view), and i'm just totally down in the dumps. ...then again, aren't i always...? 

maybe i'll make some new year's resolutions this time around. then again... how can you get to a point when you have no idea how?


there's three months and three days until my birthday. i love the number three.

...but i wasn't planning this post, or anything... ...coincidentally, it will have been nine years since i last had a birthday party... (again, the exact number depends on your point of view, but...)

hm... i used to love nine, but when i grew up i realized twenty-seven was a much more logical number to love...


...i'm probably the only person my age who doesn't like getting older. i hate my birthday, but i hate getting older in general, even beyond the date itself...


...ah, i haven't even asked for anything for christmas yet... (but that's almost as old as not asking for birthday gifts). i don't want to, even. i want things but i don't want to ask. ...i'm not making any sense, really... it makes sense to me but it's... complicated.

IN CONCLUSION FROM NOW TO AFTER MY BIRTHDAY I WILL LIKELY BE DEPRESSED. I MEAN, MORE SO THAN USUAL.

OMFG WHY? WHY IS IT ALWAYS THIS WAY? STUPID HABITS THAT HAVE CAUSES.